The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Exams. I LOVE exams.

Why?

Well it is well known that I am indeed a masochist. I go the mall on December 24th, I insist on wearing heels to work, I believe that Indian dining isn’t worth it unless I’m sweating and I willingly submit myself to Tolkien. Over and over and over again.

However, I’m not sure that that is why I love exams.

Ever since my student days I have positively cherished exam time. My most distinct memories of university are of walking across campus (UWaterloo and U of T both) on the way to an exam, enjoying the quiet, contemplating what was to come, the sense of accomplishment soon to be felt, the anticipation of yet another new beginning.

I love that moment when you receive an exam, not knowing whether you’ll have the answers, yet at the same time knowing that nothing stands in your way.

Not only do I love exam time, I love writing exams. Testing myself, pushing myself. Furthermore, I’m good at them.

Other than the learning process itself, writing exams is what I miss most about university. Even more than writing papers (and heaven knows I LOVE writing papers!).

My students think I’m being facetious when I post happy messages on the board before tests and exams. Little do they know that I’m fully, 100% sincere.



Other reasons why exams are awesome:

On days when I have exams, I only have to work until noon.
On days when I don’t have exams, I don’t have to work.
I can drink coffee whenever I want.
I can stay up past 9:30 pm.
Exams signal either the half-way point or the ending point of a school year.
I can wear jeans to work everyday of the week.
Elementary school teachers don’t get exam time off.

Hurry Up and...

wait.

wait for friends, wait for jobs, wait for life to sort itself out.

I hate waiting. I’m a planner, a doer.

And yet recently I find myself falling into the habit of waiting. I’m not entirely sure when this all started, but I would really like for it to stop now.

Listography

So Emma got this book for Christmas. The Book of Lists. That’s actually what it’s called. She got this book because she loves lists and list-writing. The problem being, this was the wrong book of lists. The one she really wanted was called Listography. Yes, that’s actually the title. And yes, there is more than one book out there about lists.

Because she originally got the wrong list-writing book, she got the Listography book not once, but twice for her birthday. Obviously she didn’t need three books about lists, what with two of them being the same book, so we took one back to Chapters. I was so intrigued by this book of lists (Listography) that as soon as it was returned, I promptly bought it. Now we each have a listography book and have been busily writing lists.

Some of the lists are interesting (Historical Figures You’d Like to Talk To) and some are weird (Your Most Drunken Moments) with still others that will never be filled out (People You Wouldn’t Mind Sleeping With…?).

Here’s what I’m finding about my book of lists: it’s weird. I feel as though it’s even more revealing than a diary (as in an “I’m-fourteen-years-old-and-write-everything-I-think-feel-and-do-in-this-diary” type of diary). There are even lists that I want to start writing but can’t yet, because it will make them too real. Weird, right? It’s just a list...

Return of the Prodigal Cousin

Ok, so “prodigal” may not have been the best choice of adjective here. While Emma is spontaneous, prone to wandering off to exotic locales and somewhat difficult to pin down on a regular basis, she is by no means extravagant or frivolous (yes, I am well aware of the fact that “frivolous” has made an appearance in three of my five most recent posts. Revealing? Quite). Furthermore, I may or may not have been the motivation, if not the inspiration (I do have to give Jeremy SOME role to play here), for her most recent getaway. Therefore, were she truly a prodigal... anything... I would also have to classify myself thus, and we are all well aware that I am anything but extravagant or impulsive.

Right.

The point being, she’s back. Tanned, refreshed, revitalized and using terminology no one this side of the equator understands (what the hell is an “Eskie” anyway?!?!).

Not only has she returned, but this weekend she celebrated the beginning of her 23rd year. So I, being the loving cousin that I am, promptly did some research, found out exactly how old she is (see previous sentence), did a bit of baking, hopped in my car (braving the arctic chill and excessive precipitation) and headed directly to Niagara Falls to partake in the festivities.

First up was lunch at Amakara (sushi pizza, anyone?). Apparently I’m the only person in Ontario who doesn’t vacate the province and set up shop in sunnier climes over Christmas, so much discussion was had regarding the glories of Australian and Cuban vacations. Mainly Cuban. Apparently the music is great. And water is wet. The things one can learn…

Thankfully, the focus wasn’t all on Emma and her rapid decline into her geriatric years. Once it became apparent that I was born in the neolithic era, conversation quickly switched to me. Based on my advanced age, death was certainly imminent. But wait! My fears were quickly allayed as it was generally agreed upon that I look pretty good for my age. Phew. Emotional breakdown (and my potential demise) narrowly averted.

That being said, there was a close call in the backseat when Emma slipped into her murderer gloves. Thankfully both Katie and myself escaped unscathed, having endured only minimal inappropriate touching.

After dinner I managed to lift my creaky bones out of my wheelchair and make it to Fireman’s Park, where my glucosamine supplement proved to be worth its weight in gold as it enabled me to send myself hurtling down ice covered hills on a plastic disk.

Tobogganing was pretty amazing, although I do seem to personally defy the laws of physics. (editor’s note: it took me no less than four tries to figure out how to spell “tobogganing”) Getting to sleep was equally amazing, as it was well into the wee hours of Sunday morning by the time we managed to accomplish this feat. Furthermore, Emma has a heated mattress pad which pretty much made my day.

And so we come to today. Breakfast, shopping, coffee and list-writing eventually led to me in my car being serenaded along the QEW by the Tragically Hip and Mumford and Sons, respectively. Sunday evening finds me back in the snow belt, preparing for my last week of school prior to exams. Tomorrow is therefore a school day, which means that at nine pm it’s just about time for me to turn in.

I have triumphantly returned to the schedule of a ninety year old woman.

Joyeux anniversaire ma chérie! Tu me manques.

Five and Twenty Fun Facts

I'm bored.

It just so happened that this particular weekend I had nothing planned and EVERYONE was busy. After having watched Shutter Island, creeped all of my friends on Facebook, watched The Fellowship of the Ring (Extended Edition) and caught up on all of my friends' blogs, I was sifting through my documents and found this "My 25" list that I had begun in Korea and never finished. So I did a little editing and a touch of soul-searching (how very introspective of me -- see number 6) and came up with this fascinating list that you've all been dying to read.

1. The only thing I really know I want to do in life is head out to False Bay, South Africa to watch the great whites breach. I LOVE sharks. Sorry seals, but you’re going to be eaten anyway, so I want to watch.
2. Oh, and I also want to get a PhD.
3. And go cage diving. And learn to play the violin.
4. I love coffee. Lattes in particular.
5. I will eat anything that is grape flavoured. And I will love it.
6. I also enjoy bacon.
7. Having my heart broken was probably one of the best things that could have ever happened to me.
8. I became a teacher because I love to learn. It never ceases to amaze me when one of my students tells me they hate school. I think I need to try teaching kindergarten, where just about everything is viewed with a sense of wonder. Which leads me to...
9. I miss my job in Korea. If I could find that job somewhere else, I think I could be happy forever.
10. I cannot stand it when people don’t know the difference between their/ they’re/ there, your/ you’re and to/ too. This is basic English. I don’t care if you’re texting me -- is it really that hard to type out “you”?
11. I also love sangria.
12. There are probably three people in the entire world who know me half as well as they think they do.
13. I’m addicted to books. I would spend every last penny on reading material if I could. Especially historical fiction.
14. My favourite number is 11. I’m not much for superstition, but my lucky number gets me EVERY time.
15. I judge people who don’t believe in post-secondary eduction. This is probably the number one thing I’m trying to change about myself.
16. I’m terrified that I’ll never figure out exactly what I want to do with my life.
17. I love mama’s boys. And metrosexuals. I mean, I’m into guys who are into their family AND personal hygiene...
18. I have a thing for thunderstorms.
19. I love, love, love to eat. But I hate to cook.
20. I do, however, enjoy baking.
21. When I was little, I always wanted a nickname. Seriously, I used to try and force people to call me by nicknames I had made up myself. That is why I secretly love it when people call me “Lady J”.
22. I’m fiercely loyal to, and incredibly protective of, my friends.
23. I’m so Green it’s ridiculous. I’m trying really hard to learn to relax, roll with the punches and embrace “whatever happens”.
24. I firmly believe that our current education system encourages students to strive for mediocrity. Which is why I would like to work for the Ministry of Education one day.
25. I have assigned a song to each of my friends. Some of them have entire playlists.

Lemon Drops and Butterflies

So, in my head I had a great day today.

Glorious, even.

In my head it was a holiday, and we were in Kensington drinking coffee (but the door was closed, so we weren't freezing). While engaging in this superb activity you suggested that we head up to the cottage, so that we may continue drinking coffee, in addition to wine, and read books.

On this glorious day, we continued to drink coffee well into the evening (clearly we don't have to work tomorrow) and even stayed up past eleven pm. Scandalous, I know.

Also, Wednesday is skirt/ dress day. This results in most Wednesdays being an improvement on the other four working days. Today, however, was not a working day (what with Kensington and the coffee and whatnot).

Pretty great, right?

Becky

Becky and I have decided to write a book.

Our first plan was to take over the world, but that seemed a little too ambitious and besides, being rulers of the earth would hardly leave enough time for Wildcraft, Starbucks and frivolous conversation.

I was originally planning on proposing the book-writing idea to Brittany, who happens to share my interest in literacy and with whom I could undoubtably create a useful piece of scholarship. She’s brilliant but...

who needs to be a contributing member of society? Overrated.

Anyway… Becky and I are writing a book. About our lives and the random… stuff … (New Year’s Resolution 2011--> swear less) that happens to us and our... lovely... friends.

We will most likely include a glossary of important terminology. Perhaps we’ll just create a companion dictionary, comprised of things such as:

"I need to work on my patience"
ie: "I need to stop being afraid of commitment"
"I need to broaden my horizons"
ie: "I seriously need to lower my standards"
“I’d like to be ‘cognitively processed’ ”
ie: well, we’ll just leave that one out for now…

Without this companion piece it would be all but impossible to understand the book itself.
I’m sure we’ll make millions.